Often when you gain “experience” in business, you realize, “Duh, why didn’t I know that…” Much like this picture of this high quality construction for wheelchair access. Unless Tony Hawk gets paralyzed, I don’t think this is going to get much use.
That’s one thing about experience, is you often gain it a few seconds before you really needed it … as in, you just majorly screwed up. Fortunately, there are some real giants in this industry that have been down the path you are either about to go down or are traveling down right now. And one of those giants in Rae Hoffman, known in the community as SugarRae. Rae kicks ass. She doesn’t hold back and will tell you exactly how she feels and will probably lace it with a few f-bombs.
Deal with it.
This business was not created with the faint of heart in mind and in this mine field, Rae put together a killer list of 48 things she knows now that she wished she knew before.
In this post I am going to expand on five of Rae’s list of 48 that had the deepest impact on me … as I swear she wrote a few of them especially for me.
1) “Don’t mistake people you hang out with at conferences as your friends.”
Don’t confide in them. The majority of people at conferences are extremely selfish and will do anything to get an advantage and that includes pretending to be your friend.
2) Never be satisfied. The bar always gets raised. If what you’re doing is working, do more of it, as fast as you can, as much as you can.
And if what you built was easy to build, then there will be competitors in your market sooner than you think. You must go hard and fast before it dries up and it will.
3) You are going to get fucked over – at some point – by someone you trust. The best revenge is being the biggest success you can fucking be. Let karma handle the rest.
No matter how you try and avoid this, it is going to happen, and it is going to happen to someone close to you. Maybe your spouse, significant other, sibling, life-long friend, it doesn’t matter, it will happen. You have to focus on you, and being a success and moving forward. And yes, karma will be a bitch.
4) Don’t buy a new business book if that last one you purchased is still sitting on your shelf unread. Pick up the unread book and read it.
Look at your bookshelf. You know you are guilty of this. Stop it now. Focus. Take the book with you. Any spare moment read and read some more. You will be shocked at how much you can take in using the small moments of your day.
5) If they don’t sit around your Thanksgiving table, then their opinion of you, your latest post or your latest presentation doesn’t mean JACK SHIT in the grand scheme of things.
This was my favorite one. Too often I would let negative opinions of those I didn’t really know affect me … down to my core, while those who sat at my Thanksgiving table, loved me and respected me unconditionally. Those are the relationships you focus on and those are the people you listen to. Forget the rest.
Now, head over and read SugarRae’s 48 and start kicking ass with your business!
Andrew Edwards says
Great tips Jerry and I thought I was the only one these happened to :)
I like this one:
“Most people don’t even know what SEO, affiliate marketing, social media (in marketing terms) or PPC is. We’re not fucking famous”
Not that I think that I am famous at all, only you often forget how ‘deep’ you are into it and many people really don`t care, apart from getting the phone to ring, etc
Jerry West says
Andrew,
I liked that one too … sometimes we get so caught up in ourselves that we think we are more important and in the grand scheme of things, we’re pretty insignificant – especially in the eyes of Google.
Peter Buick says
I don’t know Jerry.
I agree a handful of people are always out to screw you, and most people operate on “self”, and most people would take the food out of your mouth, if it meant they could eat. We’re still just animals trying to survive.
As for family, they tend to know jack about business! Apparently you have always been credible enough to not be told to “get a real job”. I’d expect my family to love me for WHO I am, not judge me for what I do. Family has no place in business.
And for anyone divorced, you know the toll being self employed can have. But that’s more about how we manage our time and relationships, and how we become efficient in business, than about being in business.
But that isn’t the way we want the world to operate.
Karma isn’t just a “nice to have”.
I also notice sugar said this
“Be kind to anyone you ever meet, regardless of “what they can do for you” – today’s newbie can quickly become tomorrow’s powerhouse.”
It’s great that despite apparently being stitched up, almost to paranoia proportions, she still manages to notice that.
Basically you get what you are given. So if you want to deal with nice people, you need to be nice.
For sure, watch your back.
Why involve people “deeply” who don’t matter, anyway?
But we are all conscious of our peers opinions. We all want to be noticed and to matter. Even to trolls.
But yes, our prime motivation and reward, should be our own gauges.
Then it lessens the impact of family and peers and trolls.
We need to stop looking for validation in others, and believe more in ourselves and our motivation.
Regardless, we make the world a better place for ourselves by making it better for others. That means we do need to share, to reach out, to support and to nurture each other – all others who will respond in a positive way.
Sure there are 5% of people who are really crap, and we need to distance ourselves from them.
But the 95% left standing need us, and we need them.
The world is full of people.
Business is full of business people.
We’re going to have a tough job if we stand arms-off, shields up and hiding our inventions so no one can ever see.
I guess I’m just saying “sh#t happens” – it’s a given. But it’s not the sh#t that’s important!
It’s what we created, or experienced, that isn’t sh#t. And then we need to share that, with others, else no one may ever notice. And others need to see, we all have moments when, we need to see that life/business isn’t just all sh#t.
I guess SEO is a tough trench, because best practice probably doesn’t win the war, and there is only 1 slot 1.
And sharing that edge, is probably never a great idea, unless we believe in “abundance” in SEO.
But even HIGHLANDER had friends/lovers although I guess “in the end” they were all mere mortals. But that’s “fantasy” anyway. No SEO consultant is an island. LOL I can’t believe I just said that.
Bottom line, we all spend way too much dumb focusing on the sh#t that invariably happens.
But ying and yang, the “point” is to smell and share, the roses.
Peter
Jerry West says
Peter Buick » I don’t know Jerry.
I agree a handful of people are always out to screw you, and most people operate on “self”, and most people would take the food out of your mouth, if it meant they could eat. We’re still just animals trying to survive.
As for family, they tend to know jack about business! Apparently you have always been credible enough to not be told to “get a real job”. I’d expect my family to love me for WHO I am, not judge me for what I do. Family has no place in business.
—————
I think you missed the point Peter. This wasn’t in regards to your family being involved in your business, it is their opinion of you as a person. My family still has no clue what I do. My mom thinks I work for Google and tells people “it’s something on the computer, I just don’t think it’s real.” And yes, I am told to get a regular job often, and was told this many times from former spouses too. I’m not immune to it, I don’t think anyone is in this business.
The point is, if you are being criticized as a person and they don’t sit around your table for Thanksgiving, their opinion doesn’t matter. That’s Rae’s point and I agree with it.
Dr. Patrick Havey says
As for people’s opinions…those closest to you — i.e. family and friends — are NOT the ones you necessarily want to listen to. Those people only know you for who you WERE — that bratty kid who rang their doorbell at night and ran, OR the not-so-smart kid who forgot to bring his bike in and it got stolen…OR who wouldn’t eat his vegetables…and on and on. You think those who saw JESUS grow up and then say He was ‘the Son of Man’ as an adult believed HIM?
Do yourself a favor – trust the judgement of those who know what it takes to be successful! They’ll tell you to be positive and believe in yourself, and to believe and KNOW that you can be and do better than you are now!! Your vision of success is beyond what anyone close to you sees.
Go for it.